Tuesday, May 30, 2006

Training Wheels

Ok, Class of Technophobes, here's your first lesson:

Start small. Dream big. Perservere.

That's your pep talk of the day, not let's get down to biz:

I would suggest that you sign up for a FREE account with Blogger or Xanga to begin. For those that don't know what the hell I'm even talking about, here's the actual websites: www.blogger. com and www.xanga.com. Xanga is more of a social networking blog place like MyPlace or AIM, so if you're in that mode, try it. If you want to be left alone to blog without having to make friends or be popular, try Blogger.

I am suggesting these two because they're fairly simple. You want to begin with SIMPLE. You're gonna make some mistakes. You're going to wonder where the $#&^ are the right places to click on to fix things that you've screwed up. You're going to feel overwhelmed by other fancy blogs that you discover as you surf. How do they design all those fancy skins and great headers you will ask yourself. Never you mind. That will come later....much later. So stop looking at those sexy photos, will ya?!

Before you begin comparing yourself to others that have been blogging before you were born or even heard the word or who have a natural talent for it because they are multidimensional extraterrestrial geeks, give yourself some love and slow it down. You WILL post today!!!

Posting is the next step after choosing a beginner template on Blogger and Xanga. Worry about skins and headers down the road, if you're so inclined to torture yourself. Now you must begin. It's going to be UPHILL for awhile as you learn. Zero whining allowed!

Write about anything. Rant about your neighbors. Write about yourself or your life. Whateva...just get it out on the computer. Always sign in with a name that isn't yours. Give yourself a fantasy name/ username. If you wanna add those cutesy little smileys on Xanga above the posting box, add them. Are you ready to add colors already? You can if you feel very daring. It's all right there above the blank posting box for you to play around with. Blogger doesn't have any of these options, but both of them offer you the option to upload photos. Don't know where that is either? Sheesh. It's the little blue box on the end of the blank posting box for Blogger, and on the top of Xanga, they actually spell it out for you: Upload photos. First, you have to have some photos in your computer. Did you scan some in or download some from your digital camera or phone? That would help.

I would suggest that you proofread before submitting or posting for spelling, grammar and punctuation, and yet don't be too hard on yourself and fret over this. Trust me. If you read other blogs, you will spot plenty of mistakes, but that didn't stop them. It won't stop you, either!

Now get to it! Write. The journey of a thousand steps begins with the first step...didn't someone famous write that once upon a time? I must be channeling him in my dominatrix gear.

Class dismissed.
**********************************************************
Zombie Award Of The Week:

Here is one of my recent emails to a company you would think would take the time to reply as I've been accepted as an affiliate by them. Now it's seven days and counting, but no reply. Do they discount anyone who asks for their help? Will anyone be home? If I don't get a reply, I will post their name. I'll let you know so you can avoid this zombie.

Aloha,

Your html code is corrupted in some fashion...I don't know what it is, but it won't work! After I put it into my template and publish again, what comes up is the HTML CODE!!! Can you re-check it, and discover what is wrong? Perhaps Blogger, the company I use for my blog, doesn't support Frames...I see that the code begins with IFRAME.

Best Regards,

Your Worst Nightmare










Posted by Kuanyin Moi at 3:14 PM

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