Wednesday, June 21, 2006

Where You Are Going

Collage by Genvieve


Class-- in the interests of keeping your blogging spirits high, I have decided to balance the depressing picture of blogging reality I shared with you yesterday. Who better to inspire you than your blondalicious cheerleader teacher (wearing flesh-colored thong underwear)? I know everyone of you are over-eager-achievers with genius IQ's that are going to set the blogosphere on fire with your content, promotion and zeal, right? You probably need a good shag, but since you're not getting any, you invest your kundalini fire in your blog, oui? So--ready...set...go! Ra Ra Ra! Sisk Boom Bah...and all that other happy horseshit!

I'm always on the clock, so I'll get right down to business and bottom-line ya. The blogosphere is growing so fast that it's a phenomena! Every dog will have his own blog soon. I'm serious. Cats will never blog, but dogs really want to blog because they're weary of tail-wagging, groveling, making eye-contact so you'll take them on a walk, and being perceived by unconscious humans as merely a pet. Blech! They want to tell you what's really on their minds and in their hearts. Just wait...you'll see!

If you want to get an idea of the growth of the blogosphere, read my buddy David's State of the Blogosphere article on Technorati. Check out those impressive charts. Yup, the BLOG Monster is out of control, and if you get in on the growth now with your fabulous blog(s), you will be one step ahead of your dog in rankings. This is important for your dog's well-being because you need to be the head of the pack. If you're not the head of the pack, your dog becomes extremely dysfunctional. Just watch the Oprah show sometime, and see how she was ruled by her dog until the dog-whisperer taught her the rules of the game. That's funny...Oprah being ruled by her cocker spaniel!

So I'm passing this message onto you...Fly Like The Eagle and blog yo fanny off!

It has been brought to my attention by a savy BRUNETTE that more people than my fan club and close friends would donate to me if they had my email address. Soon I will post my email addie here after I install the meanest spam catcher this side of the Pacific. Until then, save up your shekels for me as I need them.

Class Dismissed!

Posted by Kuanyin Moi at 10:52 AM

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