Monday, April 09, 2007

The Karmic Consequences of Blogging and The Remedies


Class: I trust you had a refreshing & rowdy Easter weekend, but now it's time to pick yourselves off the floor and delve into the deeper dimensions of blogging with my Hot Blogging Tips. So Listen Up! I offer you today the Secret Remedies To Cope With The Karmic Consequences of Blogging!

What happens when you've opened your big fat trap and posted stupid things which will live on in perpetuity? What will your great, great, great grandchildren think about you, their primitive ancestor? What do you really know about your audience and your frequent commenters? Have you considered you might have karma with your readers for good or bad? Have you attracted an old enemy or passionate lover who lives half way around the world? The universe is an equal opportunity employer, so you can bank on it you will attract BOTH your admirers and detractors.

Consider that your posting style, blog topics, sense (or lack) of humor, brilliant wit, praiseworthy content, and photos have magnetized those to whom you have karma. Of course, those with whom you have fabulous karma are keepers. However, you will wish to clear the energies of those with whom you have bad karma. And how do you know which is which? Since the universe is more than a little perverse, sometimes it might take a medicine woman to determine by throwing down the bones whether you have good or bad karma with these others.

However, NOT TO WORRY! As your wise and knowledgeable teacher, I have these suggestions to remove the potential negative karma derived from blogging:

1. Before you write a post, say this out loud: "I free myself from all envy, anger, self-pity, selfishness, negativity, arrogance, remembrance of my high falutin, elitist Blogebrity, smugness, contempt for others, condescension, opportunistic desires, my parasitic nature and compulsion to impress and lord it over others."

2. While you're writing a post, think these thoughts: "I post because I wish to freely share with others and lovingly express my creativity, knowledge, and wisdom." Chase out of your mind your desires for revenge against another blogger and desires for them to go straight to Blogger Hell (more on this subject in another post). Don't engage any crappy commenter. Turn them over to the Blogging Police Department or some other agency like my Uncle Vinnie who will be more than happy to knock on their door.

3. After you finish posting, visualize your blog surrounded by a protective power, and wave (with the third finger gesture) around your computer the aromatherapy blend of arsenic, rosemary, and garlic. Perform a protection mudra. And then call upon your Kick-Ass Karma Removal Angels to delete all of the karmic consequences of your post.

Please remember this sage advice Mr. "Humor-blogs.com"!

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Posted by Kuanyin Moi at 5:46 PM

7 Comments

  • Anonymous Anonymous posted at Tuesday, April 10, 2007  
    Without a doubt you have one of the most original blogs I've ever read and masterful how you weave your posts together in a comedic fashion. Keep it up. I am never bored reading your writing. Joe
  • Blogger surjit posted at Tuesday, April 10, 2007  
    I have nothing more to add to what Anonymous has said....and he has said it all...My best wishes.
  • Anonymous KC posted at Wednesday, April 11, 2007  
    Ah! If I said No.1 aloud, and had to remember it while writing my blog article, then, I would have nothing to blog about. *Big Grin*

    Very Sound advice, now to go and look for my Blogger Muse, one which does not come from the Dark Side...:-))

    Keep it up BB. And Mahalo for the link add. E pili mau na pomaika`i ia `oe.
  • Blogger Mushy posted at Wednesday, April 11, 2007  
    The only thing I visualize is you pouring over my post, trying to get to know me better!
  • Blogger Savvyology posted at Wednesday, April 11, 2007  
    Amusing post. Sometimes I wonder about the karma.

    At first, when I started blogging & was nervous about putting my -stuff- out there, I used to post with my eyes closed. A bit tricky but possible if you've got all the keys memorized. Not advisable if you're someone who hunts & pecks at the keyboard.

    Love your sense of humor & style.
  • Blogger Pendullum posted at Saturday, April 14, 2007  
    I used mine just to try and see if I had a voice...
    to build my confidence to actually write a book...
  • Blogger Monojoy™ ® posted at Monday, April 16, 2007  
    Hmmm... so you've finally lost it! Guess it had to happen sooner or later.

    :-(

    Jus joking. ;-) Keep up the good work!
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