Sunday, October 19, 2008

Does Your Blog Have Legs?

Class: I'm here to share a hot blog tip: kick back and rest when you're feeling the beginnning of blog burn-out.

Kicking back is what your blondalicious teacher does quite often, and even though I may loose some readers because I'm not always posting, I don't loose myself. Not loosing myself is a much higher priority for me! I really like not having to go around looking for myself--it's much more convenient to find myself where I left myself.

Are ya feeling overwhelmed by too much email, social media contacts, and obligations? Then welcome to the crowd!

Overwhelm and blog-burnout is very common these days with the frenzied social swirl of Facebook, Twitter, Plurk, Stumbleupon, Pownce, and MyBlogLog to name a few.

Here's some suggestions:

Focus on what makes your smile


Establish boundaries

Try something new

Make really silly videos. (I've been doing this and LMAO!)

Find some other kind-hearted soul to post on your blog or have guest bloggers

Post ONLY after you've rejuvenated and healed. Never ever post when drunk or high or feeling guilty or obligated or angry or desperate or...

If you follow my suggestions and perservere, your blog will acquire legs. Maybe not as beautiful as legs as these, but legs of some sort.

This post is going on "".

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Posted by kuanyin333 at 2:55 PM 3 comments

Wednesday, October 15, 2008

Three Awesome Reasons To Abolish Poverty

This post is my contribution to Blog Action Day where I join with other bloggers to write about a topic for a single day. This year's topic is POVERTY.

There are gadzillions of good reasons to ABOLISH poverty starting like yesterday, but I'll post my own list of THREE awesome reasons why I'd like to see poverty put away under a giant rock forever.

1. Poverty isn't fun or funny. When you're in poverty, you can't even imagine a world with fun! All your time is spent trying to figure out how to survive. Bummer! Poor people don't have time to read or post on blogs. Just imagine the audience humor bloggers would have if poor people had time to read and write. And I'm sure many poor people would make great humor writers too! Oh yeh!

2. Poverty slows everything down--it's a drag on our world system. All of us could probably be jetting around the universe right now in a sleek starship if we finally get this stupid poverty thing abolished. Poverty has been slowing down creativity, evolvement, and speedy forward movement of everything and everyone for far too long, and I, for one, am weary of the pace.

3. Poverty is unbalanced--and unbalanced things aren't pretty. Since I like beauty, harmony, and balance, why would I like poverty? Poverty is ugly. Even uglier are those greedy s.o.b's who take more than their fair share and put others into poverty. Who said it was khool to have all that moolah sitting in your bank account when someone else could be using it? How did the filty rich think we wouldn't wake up one day and yell out how ugly the super rich are?!

The solution to poverty is to abolish it!

You can begin this process today by IMAGINING zero poverty. Visualize how much more fun, speedy, and beautiful the world is without poverty.

Then take action by signing a check or opening your wallet with this in mind!

This post will go up on "".

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Posted by kuanyin333 at 11:29 AM 4 comments

Tuesday, October 07, 2008

Do You Have a Nemesis?

Class: I'm back to speak to you of a serious matter: your nemesis!

Since most of my naughty students have probably acquired several merely by hanging around the Blogosphere, you might as well learn the meaning of 'nemesis': "An opponent that cannot be beaten or overcome."

These opponents or adversaries may become the bane of your life as they seek to best you in your blogging niche. They may steal your ideas, scrape your copy, suck up to your best blogging buddies, make up stories about you, cheat, and in general, thoroughly piss you off. Oftentimes, the nemeis will fall under the category of Frenemy which means you can't go on the overt attack.

And truth be told, once you get rid of one nemesis, like weeds, another couple will spring up!

What do you do about your (current) nightmare nemesis? Here's my helpful tips for coping:

1. Take a philosophical stance. Rather than react with anger and write a nasty email or two, ask for help from those who know how to deal with your nemesis in a calm manner. For example, I usually call Uncle Vinnie who'll make a polite house call and 'splain things. That usually does the trick. Uncle Vinnie's house calls really make an impression, ya know?!

2. Rally your forces and friends to your side. I've heard many a story how the mob approach worked to bring repentance and apologies for the nemesis's misdeeds.

3. Calmly wait your turn. Study the Achilles Heel of your nemesis and aim you arrow at a critical moment for him/her. Study their blogs, and you'll know the perfect time when to release your post about an award or your Oprah show interview.

Yes, my dear students, I've heard many a story about the horrors of a nemesis.

Having a nemesis comes with every territory! You can't outrun them, for like in the Matrix movies, these creatures are self-replicating, and they'll return in another form. You may get your sweet revenge and kick butt after butt, but know the pleasure of victory won't last for long.

So do what your Blondalicious Teacher does: kick back with with your friends and family, have some good belly laughs, diss your nemesis as you chill, and laugh it off.

This post is going up on "".

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Posted by kuanyin333 at 4:31 PM 5 comments

Thursday, October 02, 2008

Straight From The Horse's Mouth

Class: your blondalicious teacher has been away rejuvenating and enjoying her time NOT being the Best Lil Blog Teacher In The West.

And I've been trying to get back in the blog saddle again and ride on in here with some hot, juicy blog tips, BUT other stuff has been keeping me busy. Simple as that!

You can always find me on Flickr, Twitter, Plurk, Facebook, Digg, Tumblr, and other blogs if you really need your Blog-Blond fix.

Blog-Blond must look like an absentee teacher as the spammers have been the only ones making comments! Give it up guys! I might let one spam comment sneak by me for the fun of it, but more than that, and I'll crack the whip!

I'd like to share this "Don't Vote" video with ya'll though because it's funny and truthful and powerful.

And I'll continue doing what I've always done: showing up here whenever I feel like it.

This post will be going-up on "" even though it's not very funny.

Then again...funny is kinda weird these days, isn't it?

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Posted by kuanyin333 at 6:11 PM 3 comments