Tuesday, August 30, 2011

What I Wore Today--Blog-Blond Style

Class: Have you seen or contributed to the oh-so-popular "What I Wore Today" meme?

If not, check this meme out. It's quite fun in a silly, girly way. Flickr even has a group for it.

Because your very own blondalicious teacher is something of a 'silly girl', I decided to do a collage of my very own "What I Wore Today" because so many of you email me and ask me what I wear--especially what I wear when I post drunk.

Because your teach was once again 'hammered' when I scanned my collage, it came out tipped to one side. That's what happens when you're tipsy. Don't make my mistake, ya hear!

This collage is an ode to conspicuous consumption, and there is a very profound meaning to the watch placed over my head. (Hiccup!)

I had to add my pet lion, Ginger, in a separate scan because I screwed up when I was scanning. Ginger is my fav fashion accessory of the moment...much better than a yappy chihuahua. Eh?

Betcha didn't know your blondaliciou teacher is much more than a humorist--did ya? I don't spend all my time on Tumblr. I also shop from time to time. Check out my Squidoo here and here.

What do you think about What I Wore Today?????

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Posted by Kuanyin Moi at 9:45 PM 0 comments

Saturday, August 20, 2011

You're Not All That Or One Good Reason To Blog Drunk

How has your year been going class? Have you been having pain AND gain like your teacher?

My mantra this past year has been: You win some...you loose some!

Yep, every time your blondalicious teacher turned around---there it was again: winning following losing--- followed by celebrations followed by grieving... and on and on. This was my "lesson" from the universe...and yes, this lesson is ongoing.

And while I'm at it: why not throw another oh- so- fab truth/cliche into this post: Every Rose Has Its Thorn!

I'm ready to have the saying You Win Some You Lose Some on my forehead so that every time I look in the mirror I won't hesitate to remind myself to NOT get too cocky OR too sad--for these will inevitably change in a NY city second.

So now that you've read about my dicey year, here's your new lesson, my naughty students:

You may recall I've always cautioned you not to blog and drink at the same time. And certainly, never drink AND drive!

However, after observing the success of Jersey Shore, the Housewives franchise and other reality shows, I've reluctantly changed my mind about blogging and drinking.

For it seems the crazier you act....the crazier you dress...and the crazier you reveal your AUTHENTIC self, the more success you will have!

Of course, this formula doesn't take into account the 99 percent of those who end up in the mental ward, jail or rehab....or sitting on a rainbow on the Other Side. And yet, the odds are vastly improving for achieving success with a LITTLE crazy thrown in to the mix.

(Preface for obvious reasons: This IS a humor blog--even though its theme is blogging.)

With that said, BOTTOMS UP! Throw caution to the wind! Get hammered and then hammer those computer keys with your drunken talent!

Why not let your Pain be your Gain???

Why not let your frenemies feel your sting? They're REALLY NOT ALL THAT! And you righteously owe them a good feet to the coals in your posts, eh?

Why not risk it & be your authentic self?

It's much safer to 'write it' then to 'act out' IRL is my sage counsel.

Plus you won't be so d***** boring to read. :-)

Errr...what's that I hear you asking?

Have I been drinking & blogging?

Answer: Move over Housewives.

There's a new drunk in town.

P.S. Even when you're wasted, change names to protect yo sweet a$$.

P.P.S. Don't forget to check out my Tumblr. Click here for more weird humor.

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Posted by Kuanyin Moi at 7:46 PM 3 comments